In the month that we have not spoken I have been doing a lot of thinking. I think we are both exhausted from arguing with each other.
I feel it is pointless for us to speak about it more than we already have because we clearly see things extremely differently and we both become defensive, upset and angry.
I think that your ideal situation would be us moving on, but I am not able to do that. I feel that you see this as me being “stuck in the past” but it doesn’t feel that way to me. To me,it feels like ignoring something or sweeping it under the carpet and I have tried that – it doesn’t work for me.
I have a lot of pain, sadness and anger in me from the past and I now think these are things I am going to have to resolve on my own. Because of this, I am going to take some time and space away from our relationship to see if that is possible. I need to work on healing some of my pain in order to become less emotionally reactive and to let go of some unrealistic expectations. I can’t carry on as we were whist I feel like this.
I don’t know how long this is going to take, but I am writing this to you so that you know why I am taking the time and space away that I need. I need to work out how we might be able to relate in a healthier way in the future and once I have done that, I will be in touch.
Thoughts, comments and opinions welcomed!!!