Agh! I Text T! 

Hi guys,

I can’t believe I am saying this, but… I text my T. I sent her a text message whilst she is on a break. This has never been done before.

Some background: I have today off of work and was laying in bed re-reading some of my old blogs, particularly the ones just before the break and ended up crying. Not crying crying, just some tears rolling down my face.  I was pretty surprised as I am finding the break fine but hey, clearly something had mad me cry.

I had read my note on my last session and I think I felt the strength of our bond, our connection to one another or something, I’m not too sure.  Anyway, I decided to try something I have never done before and text her.

Firstly I have never text, I always always email.. secondly I have NEVER in nearly 3 years sent her a message of any kind when she has been away – that feels like a no-go area.  Here is what I said:

Hello [T,] I hope you are enjoying your break so far.  I just found myself re-reading my notes from our last session(s) and note that I am feeling like I miss you a little bit and feeling very grateful that I have you in my life.  

I feel a bit emotional – not particularly sad or depressed, just a little emotional.  Hard to explain but it feels it will pass quickly and not ruin the day. 

I have been reading your book and playing my Alanis album which seems to keep a connection alive for me which I like. 

Anyway, no questions… I just thought I would be brave and try something new and send this to you during a break even though it feels “forbidden” somehow!

Take care and see you soon.”

 

I then distracted myself by having a shower and getting ready.. I then read for a bit.. I then went to the shop and got some food shopping done… I then came home and eat lunch.. watched an episode of a series, put some washing on… and here we are nearly 4 hours later and I haven’t had a reply agggghhhhhh.

The adult and rational part of me can reason that she may well be on holiday and not just off work, she could be at an event or any manor of things… but the child and more emotive part of me is scared now that she isn’t going to reply or that I’ve overstepped the mark somehow.

I said I missed her. Aghhh gaaakkkkkk.

To be continued.

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7 thoughts on “Agh! I Text T! 

  1. Hi Twinkletoes2017!

    When not sure, you can always ask.
    Some of my clients I ask to write me a short email to let me know how they are doing in between sessions.
    Others, I know will be fine.
    One client, who finds it hard to sense where the boundaries are I told that she could always ask. This is what she is doing now.
    It is the only way and the best way to find out where the boundaries are as it depends on the relationship category but also on the person. It is not easy to figure those out.
    It is hurtful (to you) when you sense you somewhere somehow crossed a boundary, so prevention is the safest way.

    Thank you for all you posts!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello, thank you for your comment 😀 it’s both lovely and scary to know a therapist is reading my posts haha!!

      She encourages me to contact her if I need to and she’s told me that she thinks I am scared of her reacting punitively and said that she won’t… she’s been saying this to me for nearly 3 years but today is the first time I’ve sent anything in a break so I’m kind of confident that I’m NOT crossing a boundary… yet I’m scared because it’s the unknown. I think perhaps these feelings came up because I would usually have seen her today but who knows… I wait in anticipation for a reply… I hope I get one!! 🙏

      Liked by 1 person

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